The Thankful List

 

A few weeks ago, I started reading "A Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp. And I couldn't put it down. In her simple, beautiful, heart-cracked-open style, Ann writes about thankfulness to combat ingratitude and how she started a list of things she is thankful for, intending to list one thousand gifts. I began to realize how often I live in the valley of not enough and condemn God for all the things I seem to be missing, instead of thanking Him for all He has given me and is doing around me. As a intentional act to change the way I think and see, I started a list of my own. Not only has it been soul-refreshing, but it is a lot of fun. I carry my journal around and often will take it out and write down something that came to my mind that I am thankful for. Like right now: quiet moments by myself after everyone goes to bed. White steeples against blue skies. Acrylic paint. Windy days. 

The thing is, the more I list, the more I feel like I'm relieving myself of some obscure load and freeing up space in my heart. Who knew that blackberry jam and warm towels meant so much, could do so much to the mind and spirit? Sometimes it feels insulting. Could the key to thankfulness really be this simple? Is joy something that comes with a refusal to see the shadows? Or could it be that the shadows themselves hide beauty? That I should be thanking God not only for the blessings but the struggles? Maybe, just maybe, the rough edges and tears and difficult circumstances are a blessing if I see them as such. An opportunity to draw closer to God in dependence and faith. This has been the hardest gift of all for me to write down.  

Finding Quiet

Experiencing beauty. Noticing details. Growing closer to people, creating things, finding truth, discovering.

Falling in love with the little parts of each day. There is beauty in everything, in the way that rays of sunlight find a resting place on the wooden floor and in the gentle sighs of the wind in the tree branches.

For me, this is a season of growing and simplifying and finding.
I'm trying to live deliberately and see the world through a prism of grace.

Finding little pockets of quiet in the hectic days that make up life. Choosing joy and deliberating in my heart to make time for what's important. Repeating David's prayer for God to "teach me to number my days, that I may gain a heart of wisdom."